Darkness

Even the skies are crying
Screaming their anger through the night
Making a show of it

A vast display of beauty
Capturing my attention
I sit in awe
admiring the strength and determination
of Mother Nature
her commitment to her feelings
regardless of the consequences

She pours her heart out
unto our lives
washes away the hurt in her soul
but not from mine

Still
knowing this is her reminder
that circumstances can change
in the blink of an eye
I sit here bewildered
because everything
still reminds me of you

I cannot fathom why you are gone

And so the waterfall from the clouds
is reflecting my sadness
The vivacious lightning
fighting through the darkness
is reflecting you
proving that you are still there
spreading your captivating light across the sky

You have the best view in the house
My Sweet Friend

I just wish the price you paid wasn't so high



 © Ang Boyce 2012

Endless Love

I've been trying to write this poem for years
but I can't find the words to accurately describe
the world of Love
I was born into and raised in
by the most unbelievably selfless people
I am so blessed to call
my parents

Their Love
has only grown over the decades
from what I have seen
and although my brothers and I
haven't always made it easy for them
they only ever showed us Love

I was so lucky to come home everyday
and enjoy an amazing meal
with both of my parents there
unlike so many of my friends
living in two homes
losing faith in Love
at such an early age

I'm almost certain
that I have never heard my parents fight
about anything significant anyway
they only gave me beautiful memories
rather than the screaming
so many of my friends heard growing up

They raised us in amazing neighbourhoods
with lush trees and magical lakes
and my Dad would warn me
that bears hid in the trees on the hill
at the lake across from my house
and I would tip-toe around the trees
when I wasn't running freely or sledding down
enjoying the time we spent there together
then one day I realized
that my Dad was the bear in the trees
the cuddly kind that gave great big bear hugs
and would always protect me
from anything the world tried to scare me with

My Mom would spend ages combing my tangled hair
careful not to hurt me
or brushing it gently until I was so relaxed
I could sleep
and she would tie beautiful ribbons in my hair
and colourful barrettes
while she told me she used to brush her own hair
one hundred strokes every morning and every night
I used to watch her apply her makeup
and I memorized the names of the jewelery she sold
because I wanted to be just like her
my amazing mother
who had the hardest job of all
raising me

And when I was a bratty bitch towards her
she just kept dishing out Love and support
never wavering
even though I broke her heart
a million times
and I eventually realized that I was just like her
because she shaped me into the strong independent woman
that I am today
never giving up on those I Love
just like Mom

Her endurance and dedication
to her family
are nothing short of admirable
and I'm not sure
if I will ever be able to truly thank her for it
for giving up her dreams
so she could raise her family
and ensure that we had the best possible Life
I just hope she knows that we did
We do

And if you've been blessed enough
to cross paths with my Dad
in your lifetime
then you must know
where my sense of humour
and perseverance come from

My Dad is the greatest Man I Know
the kindest, most caring Man I Know
His patience is endless
and his selflessness is beyond reason
He is so full of Love
he would do anything for anybody
in fact
he goes out of his way
to help everyone
His strength and generosity
are mind blowing
and I can only hope
I have inherited
at least a small portion
of those traits from him

If it's true
that so many grown women
search for a man just like their Dad
I am almost certain
I will never find one
as stellar as mine
because he's one in a million
but I would be content
knowing I had something similar
if someone ever looks at me
the way my parents look at each other

Now as I watch you
the Love still never-ending
as you take care of each other
and we take care of you
I know that I want nothing more
than to live a life full of Love like yours
and when I eventually marry
(yes Mom there is still hope for me yet)
how can you blame me
for never settling
when I have witnessed pure magical
Endless Love
and I have role models like you

One day I will tell my own children
the Story of my Parent's Lives
because it is the greatest Fairytale I know

I'm fully aware it began
with the story of their own parent's lives
and that so much of them
came from their wonderful families
All I can hope for
is that one day
My own story will be shared
and hopefully
it is just as remarkable as theirs.


© Ang Boyce 2011

P.S. I Love You ❤

Let's be honest. Everyone wants the kind of Love Gerry and Holly have in P.S. I Love You. We want another person to crave us and feel us around even when we aren't there. We want lasting, passionate Love that defies the depressing statistics, and we want to find it sooner than later. I don't know why so many people pretend that they don't want this kind of Love, or Love at all. It's human nature. We crave affection and despise rejection, and we expect that this kind of everlasting love is only for the movies. Why wouldn't we expect this for our own lives? I know I do. So do you. Admit it. I want someone that can't stand to be apart from me and that loves me beyond reason. I want our love to be so real that it inspires other people. I want a strong foundation of friendship that can never be broken, amazing communication, and the kind of loyalty I have always given to those I Love. I want someone who believes that these things are not only possible, but inevitable. And I will never settle for anything less.

And I'm not a naive little girl that is going to wait around for the "perfect man", because even I know that is not possible. I know that the most perfect Love comes with compromise, understanding, disagreements, and unavoidable hardships and loss sometimes. Through it all though, an unwavering commitment to yourself and the person who holds your heart. Simply Beautiful ❤

Write Now

OK
here it is
I'm doing it
writing everyday
just like you said
just like I know

Let's play with this pen
on paper
and see what transforms
see how it flows.

Don't think about it
STOP THINKING
Just let your mind go
let your wrist flow
maybe add a little colour
paste some pictures
in the book

I'm releasing
what's inside me
what will come out
only I know
except for when I don't.

Transgression
Repression
Let it all go
No more editing
as I write
just like I'm doing
right now

No one can judge you
Here
This is my own world
where I can say
what I want
and dream Bigger
than the world
sometimes allows.

I know my secrets
are safe here
If I care
to have any

Or even if I just want to
Let them go.

Keep going
Don't stop
You're on a roll

Stop thinking
Damnit

Start writing,
Keep writing
Don't ever stop...



© Ang Boyce 2011

Childhood Love

Driving down those familiar streets
where I grew up
I see a young couple
standing on the corner
kissing in the dark
and I smile
as I illuminate them
with my headlights
and remember

My childhood
basically a fairytale
in my eyes anyway
bathed in Love
and family
and laughter
endless laughter

A memory comes to me
buried in a pile of leaves
Mom & Dad
immersed in yard work
still making time
to heighten the pile
while I drowned myself
in giggles

Under ducks on the swing
from Dad
at the lake
across from our house
higher and higher
I touched the sky
and jumped

G.I. Joes
falling to their death
off the picnic table
followed by little green men
with parachutes
trying to salvage
the devastation
to no avail
my brothers tell me
I'm playing wrong

I didn't want to play
with those plastic army men anyway
so instead I retreat to the playroom
and entertain myself
with plastic dolls
that live in a mansion
with an elevator
handcrafted with Love
by Papa
possibly the greatest surprise
of my childhood

I tuck my dolls gently into bed
after they are done baking muffins
and playing piano
and suddenly
their house is invaded
by trolls
and plastic men
as my brothers take over
I was never very good
at playing alone anyway

Years later
a new home and school
all my friends within reach
a bike ride away
always together
finding new adventures
and new feelings for boys
for you

That's when it all began really
the roller coaster ride
of emotions
that I learned to call
Love
even if back then
it was only the puppy kind
it was enough for me
to occupy my mind
and heart
while everyone else
was finding new love
and new best friends
daily
I was always content
with you

Our friendship grew
far beyond what I even knew
at the time
and when I think back now
I wouldn't change a thing
except

I would have kissed you
every time

We used to dance together
and you were always by my side
at parties
and in pictures
making me laugh
while my heart fluttered
friends we remained
but it was always you
for me

A decade and a half later
you're still in my life
your inspired eyes
still enticing me
your beliefs and insights
similar to mine
you've grown into yourself
even more beautiful with age
still making me laugh
still making me wonder

Who knew
the one thing
I wanted most during my youth
would be something
that still crossed my mind
today
and that you would be the one
I fondly remembered
when I saw two young lovers
kissing on the corner
like we never did

You still make me smile
and remember
the Love
I was always surrounded with
as a child
and now as an adult
the Love
is still pure
and my life
is full of it
and even though
you aren't it for me anymore
I still keep you in my heart
and my childhood memories
are full of you



© Ang Boyce 2011

Atrocity

You can say what you want
You will never convince me
that a life for a life
is any form
of justice

I was there too
I saw the towers fall
and my eyes
were glued to the T.V.
My Heart was breaking
for the world
with the rest of the world
as we watched
and listened
words of hate
and fear
clogging the airwaves
images of devastation
destruction
death
implanted in our minds
bodies falling victim
to souls who gave up
because they would rather
throw themselves out a window
than wait for impending murder

Or was it because
they would rather
Die
than live in a world
that thrived on violence
and raise their children
to be afraid
of planes?

Didn't anyone see the Hope
the Love
the togetherness
the compassion
that this life-changing tragedy
brought forth?

Not a chance
for contemplation
because just as suddenly
as the dust from the towers
began to settle
the promise
of more violence
more hatred
more heartache
more loss
was somehow justified
in war
and mourning soldiers
and bereaved families
and angry politicians
all supported retribution
at any cost
and failed to see
that teaching children
animosity
ignorance
revenge
was an immensely worse solution
if it can even be called that...

I am aware of the irony
that those orphaned children
are likely
always going to be afraid of planes

...And Now
Rejoicing
at the concurrent declaration
of safety and justice
with whispers of retaliation
and warnings of more threat
continuing the cycle
that will forever
be played in the heads
of those who continue to believe
that there is no other way
than letting the bad guys
kill each other off
allowing the gangs
to take their rivals out
forcing the dirty democrats
to eliminate the competition
with their vicious words

and all this Hate
because too many decided
it was the only form of survival
and discounted
Love

Peace
may be forgotten
among an unfortunate group
but it will never
be abandoned
by Me

Call me a hippie all you want
the tree-hugging kind
that lives in la-la land
and believes that
Love & Peace
are the answer
to any
and All
situations
naive to the world
You see
choosing to see through my own eyes
only an impeccable balance
of beauty and darkness
never allowing myself
to forget
that Love
Always wins

Call me what you want
because I would rather be
Who I Am
and believe in
what you may see as
the impossible
than be
full of hate and despair
and triumphant
in the death
of another.



© Ang Boyce 2011

Phu Quoc

I can hear the ocean crashing
as the rain falls down
what a perfect morning
to lounge around.

I'm sitting in our room
on the damp white bed
my worries have left me
and I just don't care
There's even a spider
crawling around somewhere.

I can smell the fresh rain air
as the ocean breeze envelops my face,
Nature is speaking to me
I feel so alive here
I just Love this place.

Relaxation is the purpose here
a break from the hustle & bustle
the city provides
No crowds of people
swarming the streets
or daring to cross to the other side.

Honking vehicles and jam-packed bikes
are nothing but an illusion here;
only frogs singing
and lizards creeping
while puppies laugh
and Steph drinks beer.

It's time to lay down
and listen to the trees
whisper in my ear
Nap-time is a ritual in Vietnam.

Have I mentioned yet
that I Love it here?


© Ang Boyce
written on August 5, 2008
Phu Quoc, Vietnam